POEM - TOM

Tom's Future?

Tom’s thinking about the family coming later today,

what needs to be done before then, how much his

grandson will have grown, as he confidently moves

forward to change the oil in the car, fully expecting

his automatic mind to kick in and follow through.

But there’s only a blank!

He can’t remember how to do it – confused

caught off balance, a time of panic, before

the memory’s returned and he can proceed.

Tom doesn’t realise how easy it’s become

to transfer repetitive, physical actions over to

the mechanical mind – no need to stop and think

where to reach for the salt, the bedside clock, the

breakfast bowls, the oven cloth; no need to think

of the correct sequence of tying a Windsor knot,

 he’s done it all so often before.

As he takes a shower, he’ll think of the shopping list. 

As he cleans his teeth, he’ll think of his credit card.

As he washes the car, he’ll think about his, then the

neighbour’s garden - which will make him think

of how he likes spring, which leads onto his thinking 

about the summer coming, which leads onto…

on and on it goes, the wandering unfocused thinking 

which travels easily over well-worn paths…

with a start of surprise he finds he’s mowed the lawn!

Unused, the active creative mind, tuned to play

waits to be charged, fired up by something/anything; 

be scared, be brave, adapt to the unknown - now

reduced, it has gone into a holding pattern, bored,

loop-taping memories when life was new and raw

for Tom’s mechanical mind is gaining, more and more

power and ever-efficient it drops into a growing

archive any automatic activities Tom’s not used

for a while. When a “blank” happens, it will take 

longer and longer before he’ll remember again.

He’ll worry. Believe it’s the first signs of Alzheimer’s 

affecting his brain. As his confidence weakens, his 

activity will slow. He’ll rationalise it’s easier to shop

at the local village than drive further afield – like a

self-locking washer the mechanical mind clicks,

clicks again, into a tighter and tighter circle

locking his mind until Tom, like his father before him, 

will feel more secure staying at home. He’ll buy what 

he needs via the phone. Fall asleep in front of t. v.

Copyright: lois.e.hunter